First published 16 November 2023

Don’t you just love having your buttons pushed?  I had a conversation this week about this very topic.

There are a few people who can push my buttons and it drives me potty!

Earlier this year I was working with a teenager (in a voluntary role not as part of my practice) who, whilst he was around the age of 15 reminded me of my brother when he was around 5 years old.  Constantly with the ‘why’ questions.  It wasn’t enough to just follow instructions, no, he had to challenge and question everything!

Thankfully I don’t lose my temper the way I used to – although I did find myself raising my voice just to be heard – and then feeling terrible afterwards for losing control!  Meditation and breathing exercises came in very handy!

What I also noticed, was that I caught it quickly – beforehand, I would have been about 10 mins in to a rant before I realised my buttons were being pushed – minimum!

And speaking of my brother – he still knows how to push my buttons and it really does frustrate me!

We all have those people in our lives, whether it is someone who knows you really well, or a personality trait you think you may have that you don’t like that you see in the other person, or perhaps your energy just doesn’t mesh.  What ever the trigger – it can be a royal pain in the bum!

So, what can you do about it?

Preparation!  

Building your emotional and mental resilience is a good starting point – sorry – that means meditation, breathing exercises, visualisations and or journaling (investigate and practice what works best for you!).  If we are triggered by someone it’s cos we aren’t ready to deal with their behaviour or our responses to them.

This is where I can help.

I work with people to help them develop their resilience and coping mechanisms so that they can deal with difficult situations in a calm and collected way. I can teach you how to recognise your triggers, how to calm your body and mind when you’re feeling stressed, and how to communicate with others in a more assertive way.

And with holiday season almost upon us, I know this can be a tough time, and one where you are more likely to be around those lovable button pushers in your life!  I also know that you don’t have to go through it alone. I’m here to help you prepare for the challenges ahead and to make sure that you have the tools you need to deal with even the most difficult button-pushers. Let’s work together to make this holiday season one that is actually enjoyable – and the sooner we get started, the more in control, cool calm and collected you will feel!

Oh, and if you are immune to button pushers, make sure that you aren’t the one pushing the buttons.  And if you spot someone else doing it – see if you can step in to diffuse the situation – you might just help prevent some explosions!